Has this ever happened to you? You’ve known someone, let’s say his name is Bob, for some years now. You’ve probably see him maybe once a week, if that. You get along well with him and possibly seen him at different events.
The last event he brought someone over to meet you. He introduces you to this new person and he asks you what was your name! Wait! Stop! Hold on for a minute. You’ve known this guy for a while and he doesn’t know your name. Why is that? How did that make you feel? Not too important huh?
I know there are a lot of people out there that are really bad with names, but if you’re in business, this is not only a bad habit but it can be detrimental to your business. According to Dale Carnegie in “How To Win Friend’s And Influence People” a person’s name is like the sweetest sound to them.
Now have you ever met people who can remember names so easy as if they knew the person that they met for the first time for years and years? In the last blog post I mentioned the spider web effect and how it can benefit your business because of the network of people that you know. Those people that remember names so well are usually successful in whatever they do because of this.
Some people have really great memories, but others, like myself have to use some strategies to remember names. These strategies have work well for me and I like to share some with you.
1. When I first meet people I like to say their names over and over in a conversation –
Example: Nice to meet you John. So John what do you do for a living? Thats a nice suit John,
where did you get it? How long have you been married John.
2. I still introduce people to each other even if I don’t know their names, that way when they
themselves introduce each other, they can say who they are while I’m there listening.
(I know that’s cheating lol)
3. If I’ve known someone for a while and still don’t know their name, I tell them that we need to
connect and if they can write down their name and number on a piece of paper or I’ll ask
them to type in their name and number on my cell phone. (Still cheating, I know lol)
4. When I meet someone for the first time, I would take a mental note by repeating their names
about 10 times.
In all, people like to feel important and just by remembering their names is the first step to building your spider web for success!!
If you found this information helpful, please share with others that may benefit from this. If you like to find out more about the spider web effect you can download the ebook “Success In 10 Steps” by clicking on the link below.
To Your Success!!
Sherman Smith
Mentoring For Free
Success In 10 Steps
22 comments
Comments feed for this article
June 24, 2010 at 4:50 am
Charlene
You are a great student of Dale Carnegie. When I took his course, he taught these same principles. And yes, a persons name IS the sweetest sound to their ear so use it often (but dont play it out)!!! Great post Sherman!
June 25, 2010 at 4:01 am
sksmith
Most definitely you don’t want to play it out. You have to let it flow. Thanks for your comment Charlene!!
June 24, 2010 at 6:37 pm
Jacqueline McGinnis
Absolutely Sherman. I so agree with you that it is important to use peoples’ names to make them feel important as well as for me to remember their name. Sometimes I still don’t remember their name so I will remember your little cheats. LOL
Remember to use people’s names when you are addressing them not only in person but in friend adds and emails. The {firstname} tool in autoresponders is there just for this reason… because using their name is like you talking just to them.
June 25, 2010 at 4:00 am
sksmith
You’re so right right the emails, friend adds and autoresponders. Thanks for the comment Jacqueline!
June 24, 2010 at 8:36 pm
Peter Fuller MBA
Hey Sherman
I have to admit sometimes I forget names and I have relied strategy #2 to get me through.
I try to do word association. For example I remember your name because I associate you with a Sherman tank 🙂
June 25, 2010 at 3:59 am
sksmith
lol.. thanks a good strategy. I may have to steal it! Thanks for your comment Peter!
June 25, 2010 at 2:44 pm
sksmith
You know what, thats another great idea! Thanks for your comment!!
June 24, 2010 at 8:39 pm
Milena
Sherman you are right again! I am such a bad names memorizer , but as you said, there are techniques to get over that problem and yours are great!
June 25, 2010 at 3:58 am
sksmith
I’m not the best with names either, but people are important and they want to feel important. Even if you forgot someone’s name, make it a point to get their names. This shows how much important they are to you. Thanks for your comment Milena!!
June 24, 2010 at 9:42 pm
Charlie Holles
Good stuff Sherman. It is such a lazy excuse to say ‘I’m not good with names’. We should get better and this really helps.
June 25, 2010 at 3:56 am
sksmith
It really is a lazy excuse Charlie. This is just a simple, easy thing to do and it makes a big difference. Thanks for your comment!
June 25, 2010 at 12:46 am
Jordan Schultz
Sherman,
I remember when I read that chapter in “How to Win Friends”, and I began saying people’s names when I would speak to them… I noticed a very positive response from everyone. Especially a ton of smiles from people. They absolutely love hearing their own name… I know I do.
Jordan Schultz
~Social-Media Specialist~
June 25, 2010 at 3:55 am
sksmith
And it’s just that simple Jordan.. thanks for your comment!!
June 25, 2010 at 3:30 pm
steve shoemaker
Hey uh what’s your name……Charlie that’s it anyway uh
No seriously Sherman this is an awkward position I find myself in to. It’s weird sometimes I’m great with names and then I can see someone I’ve known for years and have forgotten their name.
Maybe I will use #3 in that situation.
Steve Shoemaker
June 25, 2010 at 8:14 pm
Sherman Smith
It happens to the best of us Steve. knowing someone for years and not knowing their names is very awkward. Thanks for your comment!
June 25, 2010 at 8:46 pm
Jerome Ratliff
I like your strategy here.
This is a great way to remember people’s names.
I do the same thing as you do. One other thing I do is I think of song that name relates to. It’s awkward, but it really does help you remember.
Have a great weekend Sherman,
Jerome Ratliff
June 26, 2010 at 12:58 pm
Karen
Love this post. Using names is such an important element of relationship building, and I like your ‘cheats’ too. I usually go with the ‘I don’t think I have your business card, do you have one with you?’ when I’m not sure of someone’s name, but in an informal setting the write it down or type it into my phone tricks are a great idea!)
June 26, 2010 at 3:58 pm
sksmith
Thanks Karen for your comment! It’s much appreciated!
June 28, 2010 at 10:13 am
Wayne Wu
Hey Sherman,
This really is a very, very important thing to remember. It’s the only way we identify other people on a human level, so remembering them is very important indeed.
BTW, thanks for reminding me of Dale Carnegie’s book. It’s been a while since I’ve read it.
Live Large,
Wayne
June 28, 2010 at 6:52 pm
Sherman Smith
No problem Wayne.. Thanks for your comment!!
June 29, 2010 at 4:39 am
Maria Eves
Yes indeed I have had those instances Sherman the tank!! hahahaha I like that. I too luv my name and Im sure others feel the same way.
So yes saying peoples names when you speak to them is so important
for your business.
They say its a lack of interest if you forget their name???I don’t think so.
I find I meet someone and relate them to someone i already know in my vision in my mind with that name.
You will find they will smile back at you when you say their name.
Maria Eves
MLMTrainingBase
June 30, 2010 at 12:08 am
sksmith
That is a great strategy that you use Maria. Thanks for your comment!!!